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February 1, 2013     Post-Gazette
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February 1, 2013

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POST-GAZETTE, FEBRUARY 1,2013 Page 13 ilabb00nonno IIIIII I pulled into the local gas station that I frequent, asked the attendant to fill the tank and waited while he handled the pump. I know several of the employees at this particu- lar station and often chat or kid with them while the gas is flowing. The employee ser- vicing me glanced at my ap- pearance a couple of times during the filling process and when I handed him the cash, he said, "You know what I like about you? You have class, something you don't see in people too often anymore." I felt embarrassed, thanked him and then asked why he said what he did. His reply was, "You're always dressed with a suit and tie, so you look the part. You treat us with respect when you speak to us, which means you act the part, so you must be secure enough to play the part with- out being phony about it." As I drove to work, I began thinking about the way I dress and act in public. My conclusion was that I learned it from Babbononno. My ma- ternal grandfather often said that he was the shortest man ever in the Italian marines• When he stood tall, he made to 4 feet, eleven inches ... that's it. He often said that he was short even by Italian standards. Once, after a couple of glasses of wine, he offered up, "Where I come from, everybody is my size. If you were over five foot eight inches in Foggia in the late eighteen hundreds, it was assumed that your mother had an affair with a Turk. (For whatever reason that I never discovered, Babbononno did not like Turks.) From this diminutive grandfather, I learned many things that I've held on to during my life. He taught me the skills for survival professionally, that is he taught me what he knew: how to play music and how to build things from wood. As a result, I became a pro- fessional musician in my teens and although I never worked as a carpenter I taught cabinet making and woodworking many years ago. Those weren't the only things I got from Babbononno. He taught me how to dress. His translated comments about one's appearance in- cluded the image you pass off to the public, "If you dress like a bum, you could have a mil- lion dollars in your pocket, but people will look at you like a bum. If you look the part and have holes in your pockets and nothing more, you will be respected due to the image." by John Christoforo A Nostalgic Remembrance II As a child, I watched my grandfather ready himself when he had to go out. He would spit-shine his shoes to a mirror glass finish. He would next lay out the suit he was going to wear and then decide which starched white shirt, necktie and pocket handkerchief he was going to add in. After he bathed and shaved, there was always a splash of after shave that gave him a nice smell, and before he left the house, he always brushed his favorite fedora and then placed it on his head looking into a mir- ror as he adjusted the brim. This is the image that I still have of my grandfather• Be- yond this, I watched him in action when, as a child, I ac- companied him. He treated people he met on the street with respect. He and Nanna both used to say regarding re- spect, "You give it, you get it." Actually, the way Nanna said it was, "Se si sputo diretta- menti in aria, si cada solo nel su' faccia." (If you spit straight up in the air, it only comes back in your own face•") She had a way with words• Well, growing up most kids find a reference point or let's say someone they try to emu- late. Even at a young age, i remembered the words and images of my grandfather and decided to look the part and act the part. Don't get me wrong, I didn't dress like Bab- bononno. I dressed, but fol- lowed the styles of the day. In the '50s, when a one button suit was all the rage, espe- cially ff the pants were pegged at the bottom, I was on top of it. To this image I added in pointed toe shoes with the sole sticking out on the side a bit to give the title of spades to the look. Due to Babbo- nonno's influence, they were always shined. My dress shirt had a rolled collar, a style we copied from Billy Eckstine, a pop singer and band leader back then. To this I added in a narrow velvet tie. From that point to now was, let's see, 58 years ago, and I still like to dress. When I lec- ture, I dress ... suit and tie. Some of my contemporaries show up on campus to teach wearing the same things the students are wearing, jeans, sneakers, a hoodie, who knows what else that makes them look like the male members of their classes. My rationale is, I'm the professor, I might as well look the part ... and for me it works. My approach in terms of respect corresponds to the image. I try to treat people as I want to -- FOR YOU WHO APPRECIATE THE FINEST -- THE MUSIC FOR ALL OCCASIONS 781-648-5678 be treated. It seems to work with both my contemporaries and my students as well. Thinking back to my days on a street corner in East Boston and the North End, there were guys who were tough and we feared them. There were those who were respectful and we envied their popularity. The choices for developing personalities were do you want to be feared or respected. Some chose the former, others the latter, and a few both. As I grew into my own, the tough guys stayed on the street corner and the rest of us grew out of it at some point. Don't get me wrong, I think the street corner gave me several tools that I've used in life, espe- cially something called "street smarts." This isn't something you can get out of a book; you have to learn it by living it. Today, they would call it a survival skill ... but believe me it works. One thing that impressed me as a teenager was the way Mr. Ray, the manager of the Seville Theater where I worked, handled people. All of the patrons treated him with respect. Most called him by Mr., not by his first name. When my father dropped in unexpectedly one night as I worked, I tried to introduce him to my boss. Dad called him Jim and Mr. Ray called Dad, John. I was shocked• What I didn't know was that they knew each other from bygone days. What I liked about Mr. Ray's image was the parade of young ladies that came into the theater to visit with him. Being an impressionable teenager, I was impressed. I combined what Babbononno had taught me about dressing and added in the things I observed where Mr. Ray was con- cerned. I developed an image that seemed to have been effective and maybe still is. In terms of respect again, I stayed at the Seville from the time I was thirteen until I was out of college. In my early 20s I was already a working musician and on my way to a career in teaching• My days at the Seville were getting numbered but it was tough to leave. By this point in time, Mr. Ray had become a surro- gate father image and when we went out to dinner on occasion, he insisted I call him Jim. I just couldn't do it. It would have been like call- ing my father, Johnny or Babbononno, Mike. The title Mr. stayed. They are all gone now, Babbononno, Dad and Mr. Ray, but the lessons I learned are still fresh in my mind. Hope- fully the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and I've passed on to my kids the things I've learned in life. I think this is true as both my boys seem to be successful in life. Time will tell and I hope I'll be around to witness the future and then look back and say, "Mille grazie, Papa, Babbo- nonno e Signore Ray." GOD BLESS AMERICA • Socially Scene (Continued while engaging the listener through keen poetic obser- vation, rich musical lan- guage and beguiling singing• Her musical roots are in classical guitar, the folk music of her native North Carolina, and jazz, with ad- ditional influences ranging from West African rhythms to eccentric pop. Sixpence None the Richer was founded by guitarist JVlatt Slocum and singer Leigh Nash. Since 1993, the Nashville-based band has released four albums, scored several hit singles, and ap- peared on countless sound- tracks. They are best known for their songs Kiss Me and Breathe Your Name and their covers of Don't Dream It's Over and There She Goes. They've landed a platinum record and have been nomi- nated for several Grammy Awards. Long in the mak- ing, their latest album, Lost in Transition, finds Slocum and Nash sharing the song- writing duties, along with musician Stephen Wilson, Nash's husband. This album features a stripped down sound. The end result is a gorgeous mix of pop hooks, piano, acoustic guitars, a bit of country and a newfound beautiful simplicity to the songs. To coincide with the album's release, the band will hit Turkey, Europe and the U.S. Berklee College of Music's Red Room @ Cafe 939 is a state-of-the-art, all-ages venue and coffeehouse• Care 939 is dedicated to showcasing, developing, and supporting musical and per- formance endeavors that fit in a 200-capacity club. The venue is open to the general public and aims to attract musicians and music fans from all walks of life. Right down to the colors on the walls, it's a jewel. The Red Room @ Cafe 939 is located at 939 Boylston St., Boston. For more information or tick- ets visit Old-Fashioned Horse- Drawn Sleigh Rally ... Old Sturbridge Village celebrates the nostalgia, romance and LEGAL NOTICE Commonwealth of Massachusetts The Trial Court Probate and Family Court Middlesex Division 208 Cambridge Street East Cambridge, MA 02141 (617) 768-5800 Docket No. MI12P5476EA Estate of CAROLYN DALY Date of Death November 12, 2012 INFORMAL PROBATE PUBLICATION NOTICE To all persons interested in the above captioned estate, by Petition of Petitioner Ishay Grinberg of Natick, MA. Ishay Grinberg of Natick, MA has been informally appointed as the Personal Representative of the estate to serve without surety on the bond. The estate is being administered under informal procedure by the Personal Representative under the Massachusetts Uniform Probate Code without supervision by the Court. Inventory and accounts are not required to be filed with the Court, but interested parties are entitled to notice regarding the administration from the Personal Representative and can petition the Court in any matter relating to the estate, including distribution of assets and expenses of administration. Interested parties are entitled to petition the Court to institute formal proceedings and to obtain orders terminating or restricting the powers of Personal Representatives appointed under informal procedure. A copy of the Petition and Will, if any, can be obtained from the Petitioner. Run date: 2/1/13 from Page 9) grace of gliding over the snow in horse-drawn sleighs at its annual Antique Sleigh Rally set for Saturday, February 2 nd beginning at 11:00 am. Among vintage sleighs fea- tured will be Portland and Albany cutters, utility 'sleighs and bob sleighs pulled by different horse breeds, in- cluding Haflinger, Standard Breed, Gypsy, Morgan, Ara- bian, Clydesdale, Percheron, Registered Mini and Spotted Draft Saddlebred. The com- petition includes divisions for adults and juniors. In the "Currier & Ives" class driv- ers and passengers wear vin- tage costumes and in the "Sleigh Dog" class, drivers' dogs get to come along for the ride. According to Old Sturbridge Village historians, getting about in winter via sleigh over snow-packed roads was easier and smoother than navigating bumpy roads at other times of the year. After the first snow of the season, early New England families usually switched from wheels to runners and from carriages to cutters. Even stagecoaches exchanged their wheels for runners in winter. Sleighs came in many shapes and sizes, from utili- tarian vehicles resembling wooden boxes set on runners with benches inside for pas- sengers, to the finely crafted and polished cutters of the high Victorian era. Bob- sleighs were mounted on four short runners called "bobs" that' maneuvered in- dependently, making these sleighs easier to turn sharply and less likely to tip over than sleighs with a single long runner on each side. Sleighing season was also a time for the young to court and families to visit. Winter was the social season in early New England. Crops had been harvested, live- stock butchered and pre- served, and while there was always work to do on the farm, and tasks were not as pressing during the short days and long nights of winter. "People not only had time to relax a bit and socialize, but traveling to see friends and relatives was easier in the winter," Kelleher notes. "The winter months were filled with visiting, organized dances, impromptu 'frolics' and other social occasions. Travel by horse-drawn sleigh usually played a major role in all the cold weather jocularity." With Valentine's Day just around the corner a sleigh ride is a great way to let your sweetie know you care. For event details you can visit or call 800-SEE- 1830. ST. JUDE AND ST. ANTHONY NOVENA May the Sacred Heart of Jesus be adored, glorified, loved and preserved throughout the world now and for- ever. Sacred Heart of Jesus pray for us. St. Jude, worker of miracles, pray for us. St. Jude, help of the hopeless, pray for us. St. Anthony, most loving protector and wonder worker, pray for us. Say this prayer 9 times a day and by the 8th day your prayer will be answered. It has never been known to fail. Publication must be promised. My prayers have been answered. Favor received. A.T,P.